Weird Thing #8 Line the shopping cart with the custom seat cover thingy

Germs are the number one enemy of modern mothers.  Never mind that no one ever died from the common cold or that there’s no clear proof that licking the blue nylon seat restraint can cause one.  So it was some sort of unique mother-hating genius who came up with the idea of the grocery cart cover — the only single product we can think of that both placates mothers’ fears while elevating them.  (”My god, where else are the bacteria lurking?!)  But then, what’s modern motherhood without unnecessary accessories.  (Wipe warmers anyone?)  The next time you’re tempted to purchase one of these prettily designed, useless gew-gaws, dig deep in your inner psyche and try to ferret out the real reason for your purchase.  No doubt, somewhere inside your grappling soul, you actually believe that with the exact right product, you will suddenly become that much hoped for but never attainable thing: A Perfect Mother!