What If?

All those mommy scene questions, answered, at last!

What if another mother at the playground tracks you down do to tell you that your son just kicked, bit or scratched her daughter?

Try not to use this moment to prove anything–to yourself, your friend or your kid.  All you are responsible for at this point is to demonstrate that you are going to prevent further aggression being enacted upon her child by yours.  Later, when you’ve had a chance to relax (as in have a stiff drink and get some perspective) you can decide whether it is still necessary to send a 10,000 word email treatise on why you are still and always have been a Grade A Parent, with photos attached.

What if my three-year-old has a fit once she arrives at her friend’s birthday party? Isn’t it rude to RSVP and then not participate? And what about the poor birthday girl who’s expecting her friends there?

Well, if you think your daughter will calm down, give her a few minutes to get used to the party and hope this helps.  But if time doesn’t heal this particular wound, this is not the right moment to teach your kid the politics of RSVP.  The host doesn’t care that you stay–and the birthday child is in a whirlwind all his own.  Hint: You should leave the gift, however.

What if all the other kids in the preschool class signed up for soccer together and nobody bothered to invite my son?

Really?  All the kids?  Or just the popular ones (according to you)?  Three kids can seem like a pack, but don’t get overly excited just yet.  Your preschooler probably doesn’t feel hurt, just you.  If you want to integrate him into this particular group, ask one of the friendlier moms if they can put you on their email distribution list (hint: if you can’t find a friendly one, don’t bother feeling left out. Feel lucky instead).